Parenthood is challenging under the best conditions. Imagine being a single parent with risk factors staring you in the face on a day to day basis; being single parent multiplies the challenges and increases the potential risk factors.Coping with being a single parent becomes more difficult because of the enormous amount of responsibilities. Single parents make all the decisions for all the family needs; task over-load, when the demands of work, housework, and parenting can be overwhelming for one person. As a single-parent, we do these things to insure that are children have the appropiate protective factors to prevent them from having to encounter the risk factors that society labels us with.
Another challenge is the emotional overload; single parents must be available at all times to meet the needs of the children and themselves as the mediator, motivator,investigator, and the terminator.Single-parenting also brings loneliness, anxiety, and depression; with a strong support system as well as being a strong self motivator we can overcome all of these risk factors.
Personally, I have a problem asking help from others; I think that I am MISS SUPERWOMAN !!! Society tries to define the family as an autonomous unit responsible for its own circumstances and well-being, I guess I am trying to say I can stand on my own. But, I have come to the realization that everyone needs a little help. The challenges of single-parenting are only obstacles that I continue to overcome; I AM A PROTECTIVE FACTOR FOR MY DAUGHTER.
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YAY! You are a protective factor! And you are so right about the risk factors for single parents. I remember times that I longed (I mean longed in the sense that every fiber of my being ached)for someone to share some extraordinary thing my kid(s) did or said. I had to come up with ways that those extraordinary things didn't vanish with my memory - so we made up our own traditions. One of the traditions is that we have a birthday dinner on their birthday - lots of people do that - but then I tell the story of their birth. I don't embellish, but it can get quite dramatic in the retelling and is a hoot at restaurants, especially the part of my youngest's story, when his older brother faked like he was going to step in the afterbirth.
I agree with Gradual Student-you are a protective factor! I may not be able to speak as a single parent because I don't have children, yet. However, my mother was. As a matter of fact, she was a teen mother. We often talk about her motivation in life-having a child. Wanting the best in life for her child gave her the determination to press on in spite of trialing tribulations, and believe me when I say, I remember a lot of those trials. Even though it may get hard sometimes for single parents, press on, because "this too shall pass" and believe that your children are watching. They may not say anything right now, but one day they will thank you, I did
I applaud all single mothers or fathers. My mom was a single mother for about 7 years. She had a huge support system, but it was still hard for her. I remember that Scott Paper Company went on strike and she had to work in the mill, because she worked in the personnel department. Her hours were awful and she still found the time to be a mother. I think that you have an especially tough job being a single parent who works, goes to school and I am sure you have many other roles to play as well. We need more people like you who are protective factors, then I might not have a job in child welfare, but oh well I could find something else. Keep up the good work!
Hats off to you. You are a protective factor for your daughter. Just be sure you put the protective factors in place for yourself. It is so hard to ask for help. I know it reveals our weaknesses to others and we dont always find that to be easy. I grew up for about 6 years being raised by a single parent. But I think that she was focused on other things- thinking providing better for me would be the best path. But I missed some mothering in the scheme of things. Keep up the good work. Your daughter will prosper, I am sure.
We need more mothers who serve as protective factors for their children. My mother is a single parent who raised three alone. She has been the entire protective factor I have ever known. I have been there to see what it is like for your parent to struggle and work two jobs to support her children so that we wouldn’t go without. In today’s society I strongly feel that “mothers to be” should have to take basic parenting classes. There are some young mothers who are not protective factors to their children; mothers are smoking in the cars with their young babies and children. Parents are not taking precautions when driving such as placing the child into a car seat. To cut a little slack, I agree that single parents have a big responsibility as a whole. So heads up to the single mothers!!!!!!!!!
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